save me for your next panic attack.
So. You’re having anxiety. But it’s more than just anxiety. You feel physically ill. You don’t know who to turn to. Your body’s all like “I’m hungry but don’t even try to feed me because I’ll reject it” and your brain’s all like “ohmygod you’re anxious and you feel sick and that person is staring at you and you probably look crazy right now I can’t believe this is happening omg”. The old song and dance, eh?
For 20 years I’ve struggled with debilitating panic attacks that have me clutching my knees to my chest and feeling physically ill. There never seemed to be a simple fix when I felt the onset of an attack. The self-help books on my night stand told me to take deep breaths and meditate. My therapist told me to picture my “happy place” until the feeling passed. My doctor told me to take a Xanax. My friends didn’t know what to tell me except “you’ll be fine”. I’ve tried ’em all (except the Xanax. It makes me anxious. Oh, the irony). While these methods have been helpful in decreasing my anxiety overall, they haven’t yet come to my rescue when I’m in the middle of a full-blown anxiety attack.
It’s not science, but there were a few tactics that helped me escape the throes panic attack; or prevent it from even starting (buyer beware: they’re a bit unorthodox). You can try them one by one, or all at the same time, or grab on for dear life to the first one that catches your attention.
Tactic #1: Become the witness to the experience.
First things first: take three deep breaths. Don’t keep reading. Just do it. Get as close as you can to nature; go to a window, or your front porch, or the plant by your kitchen table.
Position yourself as a witness to what you’re experiencing. Instead of being in the panic attack, acknowledge it. Say to yourself (verbally or mentally) “I’m feeling an anxiety attack coming on. I acknowledge this is an emotion of panic that I’m feeling, but it’s just a state of being. In a few minutes, I’ll no longer feel this way. It’s okay if I need to throw up or call home or pace the floor.”. It’s important to note that YOU are experiencing the panic, and YOU have the ability to stop the panic at any point. The panic does not run the show around here.
Tactic #2: Personify it.
First things first: take three deep breaths. Don’t keep reading. Just do it. Get as close as you can to nature; go to a window, or your front porch, or the plant by your kitchen table.
Picture your panic attack as a cartoon character. Dress that broad up in cowboy boots and a hat and tell her to “fuck off” (can I say fuck on here)? You’ve experienced hundreds of different emotional states in your lifetime, and this is just one of them. The more ridiculous, the better.
Tactic #3: A love letter from your anxiety
First things first: take three deep breaths. Don’t keep reading. Just do it. Get as close as you can to nature; go to a window, or your front porch, or the plant by your kitchen table.
It’s important to note your panic attacks come from a place of love. Your body wants to protect itself, and it uses this state-of-being as a mechanism to do so. Anxiety is a positive emotion because it brings to the surface any trauma and stress so you can address it head-on.
Read this letter or put yourself in charge and write a letter. You can read it when you’re feeling anxious, or when you just need a little boost.
“Dear you,
I know you’re feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders right now. You‘re feeling physically sick, or exhausted, or emotionally drained. I know things feel like they won’t be okay in this moment in time. But they will be. You are loved, you are adored, you are cherished, and you are more than the anxiety attack you are feeling right now.
All you need to do is acknowledge you are feeling panicked but that you are in control. You can choose to remove yourself from the panic at any point in time. Just breathe in, breathe out, and move along.
xoxo,
Me”
The Aftermath
After a panic attack, it’s crucial to not compartmentalize the experience and move on. You need to continue to practice methods to get to the root of your anxiety. There are lots of ways to do this, but we’ll save that for another time.
I’ll say it again. You are loved. You are more than the anxiety you’re feeling right now. You will get past this.
